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13 January 2018

Three Months Off The Pill, And Counting...



Hello,

I won't pretend as though I'm not imitating every advert for the pill/tampons/pads in the first photo, but I'm three months off the pill and for the most part, that's definitely got me smiling.

In the grand scheme of things, three months after three years of synthetic hormones isn't very long, and even though doctors say that your hormones should be back to normal by then, I know many women who have taken up to a year to recover. Some have been left with awful panic attacks, others with awful skin and others unable to conceive. Thus far I've gotten off lightly, with irregular periods (but luckily not in a way that makes them too often) and a dip in my mood which I'm not entirely sure hasn't been caused by external factors. It's inevitable that every woman will react differently, and while there have been a few negative aspects, on the whole I'm still incredibly glad I'm off of all hormonal contraception. And, most importantly - I'm still not pregnant.

It seems strange that I was so excited to shun my period when I first went on the pill, often running pill packs together and praising the period gods that I could be rid of my monthly bleed if a beach, or holiday, were calling my name. Three years down the line, and I'm excited that my body is finally retuning itself back to nature. I've started using Clue (an app) to track my cycles, and it allows me to enter data every day so it can start to figure out where in my cycle I'm going to be sleepy, motivated and just plain grumpy. While I'd slap anyone who told me I was being stroppy, or sad, because of my period it is nice to be able to reassure myself of that and I hope as months continue to roll on that I'll be at one with my own body clock and able to anticipate mood changes. 

In just a few months I've learnt a lot about my body, and how I react to hormone changes; for example, I know when my period is due because my breasts are more tender than a well done steak and they overfloweth just a little. I'm not a huge fan of the size increase because I'm already self conscious about my DD's, but knowing that they'll shrink again in a few days brings a relief that I never got with the first combined pill I went on where my chest was always sore and bigger. Sorry if you didn't come here to read about my boobs, but honesty is my policy. Boobs.

On that note, my libido is back too - something women definitely don't talk about enough. I was so taken back in my first post when so many women told me they'd struggled with their sex drive, to the point where it destroyed one woman's relationship. When I asked my doctor whether it was normal, they told me it was just a rumour. Then, when my own libido fell off a cliff I spent two years thinking there was something wrong with me, that I'd changed, when really it had everything to do with what I was putting in my body. We're told to implicitly trust our doctors, but when it becomes clear that so many women are being ignored on this issue, I can't help but ask if they're taking women's sexuality seriously enough. Do we just expect women to not want sex as much? The fact that would be the assumption is outdated beyond belief. The mental side effects of a loss of libido can be just as hard, and challenging - especially if you're in a relationship with another person to consider.

So - three months in, and I'm feeling a little sore around the chest, but wonderfully in tune with my own moods and body. Have you recently quit the pill? I'd love to hear your story.


Photos by Bethany Elstone

ZARA coat, TOPSHOP pants (here), & Other Stories shirt (here - on sale!), NEXT bag c/o (here), ACNE STUDIOS trainers 



4 comments:

  1. It may sound a bit weird but I decided to stop taking the pill as part of a New Year’s Resolution and I couldn’t be happier. Your comment on doctors not taking women’s libidos seriously has really got me thinking and I think there’s a bigher truth in men just accepting that women shouldn’t have a sex drive. Let’s hope this changes because I cant wait to get it back. Thank u so much for sharing your story!

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  2. Coming off the pill was one of the best things I ever did. With in the first month I felt like I could think more clearly and as though I was ‘free’. It sounds very dramatic but I hadn’t realised how much the synthetic hormones had changed me, when I was taking the pill I had terrible mood swings and often got very anxious and depressed. I’ve been off the pill for almost 2 years now after being on it for 6 and I don’t regret it one bit, I feel connected to my body and in control of my emotions and my boyfriend and family have said I’m so much more happy. I’ve also not had any pregnancy scares. I think women’s contraception needs to be spoken about more, thank you for sharing your experiences!

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  3. love this post! i've struggled with the implant and now i'm suffering with an ovarian cyst...this i doubt is simply because of the implant but on and off bleeding pain etc side effects that were definitely the implant i'm glad that's out of my body now. You're a total babe!! Love your blog :* x hivenn

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  4. Hormones are a very serious thing, do not self-medicate in any way. My friend chose the drugs and tried to treat herself, but it was different. I advised to her one clinic, where there were free consultations, you can see here check it. Doctors put a disappointing diagnosis, it took her almost a year to cure her illness, which was aggravated by her drugs.

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